First Shahrukh Khan, and then today Shilpa Shetty and Priety Zinta - the bollywood gang is on their way to where they belong - Mumbai!

The day began quite badly and continued to get worse.

First the news of Symonds not making it to the Ashes squad. How sad.

Then the Fake IPL Player proving that he is a coward.

Then the Rajasthan Royals, the defending champs, being kicked out by the worst team in the IPL. No more Shane Warne. Complete sadness!

Thank heavens for the Chennai Super Kings putting the brakes on the Kings XI and bringing some semblance of excitement to the day.

This more or less means that both the Deccan Chargers and the Royal Challengers Bangalore are on their way to semi finals.

I really don't think that a loss for either of them will drop their respective net run rates from +0.265 and -0.253 to below -0.483.

I don't believe its possible, unless Deccan inflict a heavy defeat on Bangalore.

Doubtful.

So what could have been a potential cracker of a do or die match for both teams, will now be a relatively insignificant one.

The only thing at stake would be who faces who in the semis.

The winner of the Deccan-Bangalore match will take on Chennai, while the losing side will take on the Delhi Daredevils.

Who do they fancy?

In the overall scheme of things, how the Semi Final plot was unraveling, tomorrow is quite a downer as the last day of the group stages.

Still, here's rooting for a Deccan win so that a potential Deccan-Delhi final could be set up.

Here's also rooting for Glen McGrath to finally get a game and do battle against Sachin Tendulkar once again.

Remember the questions?
Here are the answers.

What does DLF stand for?
Delhi Leasing and Finance. Now how many of you knew that?

Why are there so many bollywood personalities involved with the IPL?
Cricket and Bollywood is the lifeline of the Indian population. Plus would you care if Vishal Bhatia, Vikram Chopra, Amit Pandey, and Nishant Gandhi owned the teams? Yeah I guessed not.

Why does Vijay Mallya own one team and sponsor others that he doesn't own?
Mallya believes in having his eggs in more than one basket. Did you know he was the biggest sponsor of the team that won the IPL last year?

Why is Yuvraj Singh so grumpy all the time?
He isn't getting laid in South Africa.

Why are the commentators drunk all the time?
There's free booze being served in the commentary box and the commentators are not letting go of an opportunity of a lifetime in times of recession.

What sort of a cricket tournament gets Shane Harwood and Lee Carseldine a spot in the XI but benches Glen McGrath?
One where Shane Warne believes in the abilities of experienced oldies and young amateurs and Sehwag doesn't.

Where is Mayanti Langer?
Still in Dubai, shopping, beaching, and chilling. If only Lalit Modi could lure her away from the ICL honchos.

What makes Shane Warne so hyper?
Pills his mama gave him.

What is a DLF Maximum?
The Maximum loan amount one can get from DLF. In these times, its only Rs.6!

Why don't Cricinfo have the accurate squads of the IPL teams?
Cos they suck!

How could Parthiv Patel keep opening when Murali Vijay is sitting on the bench?
Dhoni's paying Patel back for taking his spot in the Indian team.

Why does Priety Zinta hug all her players but Shilpa Shetty doesn't?
Raj Kundra is not as open minded as Ness Wadia.

Who is the Fake IPL Player?
An anonymous coward.

Where are the Pakistanis, the Bangladeshis, and the Zimbabweans?
Pakistanis up in the mountains, Bangladeshis on the bench, and Zimbabweans in Mugabe-land.

Why is Niel McKenzie a commentator - has he retired?
Its one of those unannounced retirements, and he's commentating cause of the free booze. Word has it that he tapes down the toilet seats while he's on the mike.

Where is Shahrukh Khan?
Dancing at weddings in India.

How did Jacques Kallis and Mark Boucher end up in the same team?
They came in a buy-one-get-one-free deal.

Why do the commentators at the dug outs make it look like they are doing something suspicious?
Cos according to ICC laws, they are not supposed to be there. Has someone told them they're on LIVE TV?

Why do so many wicket keepers play for Kolkata Knight Riders?
Cos John Buchanan sent the batsmen and allrounders back to India.

Do the cheerleaders know when a boundary has been hit and a wicket been taken or do they get their prompt from the DJ?
Prompted by the DJ. They do know which song is their team's song.

Who is the master - Warne or Murali?
Whoever wins the IPL.

Why is there so much royalty in the IPL?
The Indians are stuck in times of the queen.

What is a Citi Moment of Success?
Its what Citibank went through between 2002 and 2007. Sadly the moment of success ended after that period, but the IPL defies logic and recession.

Has someone kidnapped Lalit Modi?
No he's back on TV and sms-ing as intensely as ever. Looks like the Dons told him to stay in touch more often.

Why doesn't VVS Laxman talk to anyone?
He's tired of listening to, "you're not a 20-20 player".

What prompted Vijay Mallya to give the captaincy to Anil Kumble?
Mallya did not want to apply Buchanan's multiple captaincy theory by giving it to Kallis.

Why are so many retired Australians still playing cricket?
Cos they're damn good!

What happened to the bowl out?
It lives on, in Lalit Modi' head.

What is a Citi Moment of Judgement?
A commentator blunder.

Is Rohit Sharma a bowler?
In the IPL, even Raina is a bowler.

Which team do you support?
Depends on the day and mood.

Honestly, I was a bit surprised to see Brett Lee playing today for the Kings XI Punjab.

Not because he was in Dubai 36 hours ago, but because he replaced Yusuf Abdullah.

At the half way stage of the IPL, Abdullah was the leading wicket taker. He's still right up there, only placed 2nd.

Then here comes a pacer - who has just returned from injury, who 2 days ago played his first cricket match after half a year, who had lost the art of taking wickets before his lay-off, who is no longer the premier fast bowler of the country he represents - and he replaces one of the best bowlers on show at the IPL?

Fair?

With Kings XI suffering this season, surely they should have gone in with their best team.

Maybe playing Lee and Abdullah both would have made sense.

Sure Katich scored a 50 last game, but he's not exactly cut out to be a 20-20 cricketer.

Was it Lee's reputation that got him the game?

Maybe it was Priety Zinta who calls the shots and gets her favorite players in - Lee, after all did call her his favorite bollywood star.

Or is it that the Kings XI (read Tom Moody) who are doing Australia a favor by providing Brett Lee much needed match practice before the ICC World Twenty20?
____________________________________________________________________

Addendum after the match:

In hindsight, I guess they played Brett Lee so that he could bat, hit that 6, and those winning runs!

There was a time when aspiring cricketers use to try and and register performances for their schools, colleges, clubs, departments, and age-group and grade cricket teams in order to become a permanent fixture in a domestic side.

The objective to get into a domestic team was to perform, get big scores, get a bundle of wickets and get into the eyes of the selectors for a break into the national team.

That used to be the path to international cricket.

In England its the B teams of counties and clubs through which you can make it into a county. In Pakistan its the thousands of clubs, associations, zones, and departments that get you a ticket for a place in a regional team. In Australia its club and grade cricket that gets you into one of the state sides. The same is surely the case in other nations.

Its all changed now.

With the IPL being an international extravaganza and witnessed by audiences including fans, selectors, boards, and the likes across the world, aspiring cricketers seek an opportunity to display their credentials in the Indian league to make it into the international league.

Or even to become a permanent fixture in their domestic side.

Kings XI Punjab's latest signing is an Australian by the name of Burt Cockley, who thinks that playing in the IPL will provide him the chance to play more for New South Wales.

This what he said on hearing about his signing: "I hope that playing in the IPL will improve my chances of playing more for NSW."

Imagine that. A young boy wants to play in the IPL to play more for his domestic side to achieve the ultimate goal of appearing for his country.

Who would have thought that in only its second year since inception, the IPL would have such a reputation.

Lalit Modi must be jumping up and down and doing cartwheels on his water bed after reading this. Or maybe having a joint in celebration.

Coming back to Cockley, he has played 5 first class games and 2 List A games and as many as ZERO 20-20 games! And his record shows nothing of note.

Then what made the Kings sign him on?

Maybe his name - Cockley. Its most appropriate for the team he joins that is led by a very cocky Yuvraj Singh.

Cocky Cockley under cocky Yuvraj's cocky IPL team.

Well done Preity Zinta.

If you're wondering how Zinta or the Kings heard about Cockley, the answer is their coach, Tom Moody.

Moody says that Cockley bowls at over 140ks and that is what made the Kings sign him on despite having no experience of 20-20 cricket.

Cockley is the Kings' 6th Australian signing after Brett Lee, Shaun Marsh, James Hopes, Luke Pomersbach, and Simon Katich.

With Lee injured, Cockley might even get to play a few games, if not all of them.

After Shaun Marsh and Shane Watson, here's another Aussie looking to enhance his reputation through the IPL.

I'm still wondering about the name. COCKLEY!

She's a well known Bollywood actress.

Shane Watson was the man of the series in the 1st season of the Indian Premier League. Emerging Media paid $125,000 for his services.

Shaun Marsh won the Orange Cap for being the leading run scorer. Priety Zinta and her partners paid $30,000 for his services.

Sohail Tanvir won the Purple Cap for being the leading wicket taker. Emerging Media paid $100,000 for his services.

The combined investment in these 3 stars - $255,000 - is a half of what Anil Kumble was paid, a third of what Jacques Kallis was paid, and less than a fourth of what each one of the icons earned.

Watson, Marsh, and Tanvir will be the most sought after players when the trading floor opens next year.

While no one would want the likes of Jacques Kallis.

Franchises will bid big amounts for the 3 top performers.

While RCB will look to sell Kallis for as low as possible.

So what will Emerging Media and Priety Zinta do when they are faced with attractive offers for trading their star players?

And what will RCB do when no one is willing to buy Kallis?

If EM and Priety decide to keep Watson, Marsh, and Tanvir and not trade them (which should be the case given their performances) then will they give the 3 a pay hike?

They don't have to since all 3 are bound by 3-year contracts, but their performances demand a pay hike. Especially if other franchises are willing to dish out huge amounts for them.

What about a non performer like Kallis? RCB wouldn't want him, but then no one else would either. He will probably be benched but due to the 3-year contract he will have to be paid $900,000 whether RCB play him or not.

Major Dilemma that is.

What will the IPL franchise traders do? What will the franchise owners do?

Its still 9 months or so till the IPL trading floor opens, but what will go down already looks intriguing.